I went 365 days (well, 363 days because it is not the actual end of the year) without shopping for myself. And you know what?? Not shopping sucks. There. Ok. Feel better? I sure do admitting that.
This has been the HARDEST thing I have ever challenged myself to do but it has been worth it. Seriously. As HARD HARD HAAARRRRRDDD as it has been, and damn it has been HARD, it has been worth it. I have learned SO much about shopping, my personal habits, the dependency it is for me, and more.
Hold onto your seats because this is going to be a long one. Worth it, yes... but it's a lot. I mean, shopping runs in my veins and I gave it up for an.entire.year.
At the end of 2018, after having what I thought was a difficult resolution of a selfie every day to commemorate #thisis40 on Instagram, I decided I needed to reevaluate my spendings and made the resolution to not shop for myself in 2019. I followed alongside Meg Hall in her #noshop19 challenge and went hard core. Read all about my decision here.
I updated on the blog throughout the year with some snippits. I also share a LOT in my Facebook group and I did on Instagram before I took a little break from that part of social media for the end of the year.
Month 1 update This is where I shared what things I'd done to help the process run smoothly. Unfollowing 'influencers' on social media. Refusing to swipe up. And giving myself rules. RULES were needed.
Month 2 update and Month 3 update
Month 5 update Here I delved into my rules because I kinda sorta didn't cheat. Did you remember this one?! Did you think it was cheating? I ended deciding it was NOT cheating.
Halfway update A few insights into what I learned.
Month 8 update Getting real with you on this one and open honesty that not shopping is hard because, well, it's called retail therapy for a reason.
And now here we are. The end of the year. The final recap.
First of all. Here is what I have "purchased" for myself this year:
- a sequin blazer from ThredUp for 53 cents after using credits (I posted about whether or not this was cheating and it was determined it was not cheating)
- a pair of workout sneakers because I ripped my old ones, $100 out of pocket, a necessary purchase
- a pair of Birdies that I traded someone on Poshmark for, free as a trade
- a black TopShop dress I had been stalking for 3 years on Poshmark, used $20 credit on it, nothing out of pocket
- a yellow Anthro kimono top I, again, stalked on Poshmark, used $45 credit on it, nothing out of pocket (this ended up not fitting and being mistagged and I have HORRIBLE buyers remorse over it)
- a yellow JCrew raincoat, a necessity as I didn't have a raincoat, but cost me 3 cents after rewards and stacking coupon codes
- a JCrew rollneck sweater that was a gift but I exchanged it for a different color that wasn't the same price, spent about $5 out of pocket on the price difference
- some new underwear from Soma, a necessity, but waited for a killer sale and stacked coupon codes on top of the sale price, $30 for 9 pair
- a pair of Spanx leggings on crazy sale ($19) on Zulily
*I succumbed to the pressure on this one and am less than impressed with them. Wish I hadn't bought them. Total buyers remorse.
- a pair of black booties over Thanksgiving weekend after finally finding a pair that fit, that was comfortable, and that was affordable - $52 (I did not own a pair of black booties until this purchase and was on my list of can-buy items via my rules)
- a JCrew cable knit sweater for under a dollar with a $50 JCrew gift card in the mail
- 2 new pair of Rothys, both bought with referral credits, so nothing out of pocket
- a new pair of Spanx shaping underwear (bought from Shapermint), a necessity as my Spanx bit the dust in the wash this year $12
- a new bathing suit coverup and burgundy dress, both from Amazon, bought with Amazon referral credits, nothing out of pocket
- Hannah Andersson matching family pajamas for the holidays (on crazy sale with a coupon but still more than I wanted to spend but SO worth it) $140
- an Anthropologie dress off of Poshmark via trade, nothing out of pocket
- a pair of Madewell jeans, via Poshmark, using credit, nothing out of pocket, to replace my everyday jeans that ripped and needed to be replaced
- a pair of leopard booties, bought in December but arrived in January (does that count?!) with Poshmark credit so nothing out of pocket
- matching mommy & me aprons, via Poshmark with credit, nothing out of pocket
- a pair of faux leather Spanx leggings via Poshmark with credit, nothing out of pocket (again, succumbing to social media pressure of the *best* leggings ever and truth is, they are even better than sliced bread)
Seems like a lot when I list it all, doesn't it. Yikes! I spent $360 total on "shopping for myself" this year. And that includes matching family holiday pajamas (a yearly purchase we make) and $100 sneakers. So realllllly I only spent about $100 out of pocket when I deduct those two purchases. $100 on myself for an ENTIRE YEAR. Let's focus on THAT for a moment. That's like nothing!! But here's the thing: What's crazy is I can totally justify every purchase, every item had a reason for purchasing it, nothing was a spur of the moment purchase, and every item had thought and purpose behind buying it.
Which brings me to the biggest thing I have learned this year:
SHOPPING NEEDS A PURPOSE.
For me, shopping is complete retail therapy. I get a high from it. It's my drug of choice. It fills a void I have inside. I enjoy it 1000 times more when something is causing turmoil in my life. Family drama, a sudden death or loss, friendships gone south, a cranky toddler, a spousal disagreement, rainy day blues, snow day blues, you name it. Whatever causes me stress also fuels my desire to shop.
When I have a purpose and a specific item I need and am looking for, it is just as satisfying if not more. The excitement I felt finding and scoring the two items I'd been hunting for a long time made me feel like I was high on a drug or had just won something on a scratch off lottery ticket.
What y'all have been asking and want to know...
How have you avoided resisting temptation without completely avoiding/ignoring the internet?
Well, the first thing I did at the beginning of the year was unfollow over 1000 'influencers' on Instagram and social media. The constant "you need this" and "swipe up for the new must have" was just too much for me. Not only was it tempting, I was honestly annoyed. Really? Is this REALLY a must have? Is it really your ABSOLUTE most favorite thing EVER?! I doubt it. Do you want to make 17 cents off of my purchase? That's more like it.
How did you build up the willpower?
Basically, I am stubborn. People didn't think I'd be able to do it. And I wanted to prove them wrong. I wanted to prove I was capable of self-control.
Hardest thing not to buy? How did you deal with it?
Honestly, I miss TJMaxx and HomeGoods. I haven't been in either store all year (except to help a friend shop one day) and I miss the fab find. I miss the mall. I miss the outlets. I miss the great deal, the incredible bargain, that gorgeous piece for a steal. I don't miss digging the racks because I hate that. But I do miss that random fun find. I also miss strolling the clothes section in Target. I avoided that area like the plague this year. And I cannot WAIT to go back. I don't think I'll buy anything but just to wander and browse... I miss that.
How would you define need vs want?
A need is something you truly need and can't imagine your wardrobe without. A classic staple. A perfect basic. A fun pop of color or print to mix in easily. A want is everything else.
If I lose substantial weight, can I buy stuff? What limit would you set to this?
Ummmm.... YES. We don't want you walking around naked or looking like a frumpy homeless person now do we?! I would stick with basic basics and a capsule-like wardrobe til you are done with your weight loss AND have maintained it for a clear period of time. Clothes are expensive and constantly rebuying and replacing the same items in different sizes is no fun for you or your wallet.
If you were to do it again, would you do it the same or set different rules and boundaries?
First of all, I would NEVER do this again. NEVER. NEVER EVER. NO WAY. Nope. Got me? Second, I set some lenient boundaries in the beginning but didn't actually utilize the leeway I gave myself. For example, one rule was if I went a full month without buying something for myself then I could buy something off of my list of things I wanted. I didn't do that until almost the end of the year.
As far as rules and boundaries, I would be more lenient with myself and not be my biggest critic and constantly judge myself.
Do you think you have made extra of other purchases to suffice the need to shop? Like clothes for Ness or Dave or household decor?
Nope. I actually was just as good for them as I was for myself. I surprised myself there.
And also - household decor was on my list of what I couldn't buy as well. So I didn't buy any of that either.
What do you do to cope with stress instead of shop now?
Drink wine. You asked and I'm being honest. #sorrynotsorry I have also read a LOT more this year. Almost twice as many books as the prior few years. I also went back to my love of art and have been doing that more this year as well.
What was the biggest impact? Time? Money? Stress? Less stress?
The biggest impact for me was the realization why I shop and how it is truly a coping mechanism for me. I saved time because I wasn't shopping to occupy time or spacial energy. I saved money because I was spending less. I saved stress because I wasn't wondering how I was going to pay a larger than normal credit card bill.
I was able this year to not only pay off the minimal credit card debt I had but I was also able to pay for my son's activities easily. Part of my resolution was also to purge my home. I got pretty far in my basement, including a tag sale over summer, and REALLY purged my closet and listed hundreds of items on Poshmark. I made a pretty penny there this year and have saved almost all of my earnings to splurge on a playscape for my son this upcoming year and a fun family trip somewhere.
Did you online shop and leave it all in your cart?
Yes. Seriously. There were days when I just really wanted to shop and would make online carts all over. JCrew, Nordstorm, Anthro to name a few. Plus, if pieces really sparked my interest and that I could envision easily fitting them into my wardrobe I added them to my 'wish list' note on my phone. That list is quite long right now but only because it's been growing all year. I have added, and deleted, many items throughout the year but some have stayed put so they'll be things I hunt for early on in 2020.
Did you track what you think you would have spent if you acted like you normally shopped?
I started to. At the beginning of the year, whenever I was out and would grab something and eventually put it back (a graphic tee at Target, cute boots for my son, a fun throw pillow) I would take that amount of cash the items cost and shove it into an envelope. After about 2 months I stopped doing that. And used that envelope of cash to pay for a few of my son's activities for the season. But here's the thing too... I don't walk into Nordstrom, see a mannequin in an outfit, and buy everything they're wearing. I am a bargain hunter and love a good deal AND a great find. So 'normally shopping' will be interesting come January 1st.
Is there anything you really regret not buying? Not just an "I wish I had that" but a completely sad missed out on purchase?
YES! I was helping a friend shop in TJMaxx and found a Rachel Zoe sweater coat, in my size, for $30. I tried it on and it was perfection. And I did not buy it. It is a good 3 months later right now and I still think about it often.
What recommendations do you have for someone who wants to do this in 2020?
~ Have a reason and a purpose for doing it. First and foremost. Prepare ahead of time and come to grips that it is HARD. No new shoes at Target. No fun new throw pillow from Home Goods. No random Amazon box arriving with something you forgot what it was. No new lip gloss or nail polish.
~ Give yourself rewards. I had told myself if I went a full month without a purchase that I could buy something for myself. I never actually did it but had it there just in case.
~ Track your what-I-would-have-spent longer than I did. I only lasted a month or so doing that. I'd love to see what I actually saved by the year end.
~ Don't be hard on yourself. I cried often this year because I just wanted to go shopping and was denying myself the ability. Even if I gave myself $50 and a few hours at the mall, I might have not bought anything but the time wandering and browsing would have made me feel better via retail therapy.
~ And pleeeeease, at the end, take what you've saved and treat yourself. Money towards a new home, pay off debt, a splurge you've always wanted, an incredible trip, ANYTHING. Buy SOMETHING for yourself because if you make it, you SO deserve it.
MY SHOPPING PLAN FOR 2020
Buy whatever I want. Ha! Just kidding. But I do have some ground rules for myself.
- No immediate purchases, regardless of what a great deal it is. I will continue with my notes app and writing down things that I want, where I saw it, and leaving it there for a bit to decide if it is a worthwhile purchase that I will use and wear. Otherwise, it's a no go.
- Poshmark is free shopping. Because I sell so much on Poshmark and have credits, it equates to free shopping in my mind. No money leaves my bank account. No charges appear on my credit card. Therefore, it be free. Don't argue with me. I'll win.
- I truly do have plenty of stuff. I really don't neeeeeed anything else. We all have enough. But something pretty shiny sparkly and new is fun. Denying yourself that is just mean. So I'll treat myself once in while just because. It won't be a $1500 handbag every month, not to worry. But I will treat myself because I deserve it.
- Continue to say no to fast fashion. I don't need to be on trend and 'cool' because I prefer a classic, simple, preppy style anyways. In this world of influencers everyone is trying to sell you something and not succumbing to that pressure is my main shopping goal of 2020.
- Make a list of what I need and what needs replacing. Stop and think before I buy. Do I already have this? Do I need another striped shirt? Can I wear this multiple ways and for multiple occasions?
WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE...
Here's the thing. This resolution for me... It's like a diet. Everyone needs a cheat or exceptions. I don't have a curated wardrobe. I have a wardrobe that's ME. I don't wear $250 sweaters and $400 jeans. My favorite t-shirt is $11 from Target. I love JCrew and would live in Madewell if I could. I am basic but clean cut. I love preppy classic looks with a little punch for fun. Which makes for a wardrobe that's a little bit of a clusterf*ck. I wear a variety of colors and don't live in blue, grey, and cream. I am a shoe whore and while I purged this year probably 50 pair of shoes, I am itching at the bit to add a few classic styles into my collection.
When all is said and done, I am damn proud of myself and how I did. And I'd love to hear your thoughts on it too.
It has been 8 months of the hardest challenge I've ever given myself. NOT SHOPPING. Effective January 1st of this year, I vowed to not shop for myself. Period. (see this post for the rundown)
I've been asked for tips and advice for others who are debating the challenge so here's a quick rundown of how it's gone, what I've realized so far, and some advice I wish I had prior to starting. Hang onto your seats, it's about to get real honest...
IT IS HARD.
Like REALLY hard. Know this going into challenging yourself to not shop for a year. Accept it, truly accept it, and know there will be days where all you want to do is go to Home Goods and buy a throw pillow. But you can't. In all honesty, try it for a month and see how it goes. Most people can't even make it a month, let alone a year. I'm stubborn as all hell so I'm gonna make it. But so many of my friends have attempted one month of not shopping and didn't make it. Why? Because it's hard.
SHOPPING IS THERAPEUTIC.
It's true. It is. I swear. Shopping calms you down and distracts you from reality and your problems and emotions. It makes you ignore everything else going on and allows you to focus on something completely different. The hunt for a deal. A great new pair of shoes. Fun jeans that you didn't think you needed but one more pair who cares.
YOU OWN ENOUGH ALREADY.
This is a huge struggle for me. Because, well, I do. I own plenty. If I didn't shop for another 5 years, I'd be fine. I'd have enough clothes to wear. Enough accessories to tweak my outfits to be different. Plenty of shoes to rotate through. You do. You own enough. But doesn't everyone want something new, something fresh, something they saw in an ad or while scrolling Instagram?!
In all seriousness, do I really need another striped tee or pair of jeans? No. I have enough. And so do you. Thank me later.
SOCIAL MEDIA WILL BE YOUR WORST ENEMY.
Do. Not. Swipe. Up.
There. I said it.
All of these bloggers and influencers just want you to swipe up because you "have to have it" and it's "the best I've ever seen" are full of it. They want to make $1.47 off of you buying a pair of leggings or a new razor.
Don't fall for the social media pressure and confuse that inner feeling of wanting to be part of the cool club with the knowledge of what you really need. Take a step back and just say no.
YOU HAVE CLOTHES YOU FORGOT YOU OWNED.
Part of this resolution on top of not shopping was to also purge. I had a teacher wardrobe, an admin wardrobe, a pregnant wardrobe, a mom wardrobe, and a whole bunch of nonsense mixed in (including numerous gowns from black tie events over the past 25ish years). My biggest piece of advice: purge baby PURGE. I swear, you won't miss it. You won't even know it's gone. You can go all Marie Kondo on your closet if you want, but I'm all for baby steps so you don't have a nervous breakdown. Because I totally would've lost my s-h-i-t if I used her method.
Take everything out of your closet. Look at each item of clothing (no need to thank them or hug them) and immediately decide keep, sell, or donate. I guarantee you'll find pieces you forget you even bought that still have pricetags on them (happened to me), you'll find pieces that haven't fit you since you were 17 (happened to me), you'll find pieces that spark memories (happened to me), and you'll find pieces that make you question your sanity (happened to me, that damn crop top from 2002)
Part ways with the things. They're just things. And you have to get over how much you spent on it or what a great deal it was or where you were the last time you wore it. It doesn't matter. It's just clothes.
Put back everything you decided to keep and sort it. If you find a plethora of a certain style (for me it was button downs and striped tees) really look at each of them and see what you L-O-V-E and what flatters you. I bet big bank some don't even fit or flatter. Then say buh-bye to them and stick with the best of the best because when you wear them, you'll feel and look like the best of the best.
SHOP FOR OTHERS.
This helped me soooo much. It gave me my fix. My best friend hates to shop. Hates, hates, HAAATES. So I do it for her. And it gives me my shopping fix when I need it most.
Also, one of my other besties is obsessed with shopping like I am so she sends me links almost daily. So I shop vicariously through her, and her wallet! Win Win.
UNDERSTAND NEED VS WANT.
This is a struggle. Do you really NEED it or do you just WANT it? 99% of the time you want it. Take a step back and really decide one way or the other.
PERSONAL STYLE BECOMES APPARENT.
I have always been clean cut and preppy. Always. Wearing a uniform for a chunk of my childhood might have had something to do with it but regardless, that's been my style. Over the years, I felt I needed to be trendy and cool and hipster. Why? Who knows really. But I felt that way. So I shopped accordingly. A hippie dress here, overly distressed denim there, a floppy hat over here, cutout booties over there. For no other reason than I thought it would help me fit in. But why fit in when you were born to stand out? Seriously though. Figure out your personal style and shop accordingly. Look at your closet and see what works with YOUR style and what doesn't. Don't try to be someone you're not. You do you boo.
IT'S QUALITY NOT QUANTITY.
THIS. This has been game changing for me. I was raised to believe it's all about the bargain. I'm a deal hunter. I love a good sale and I LOOOOVE a bargain. But when I wash it once and it fades and wash it again and it falls apart, I flushed my money down the toilet. Take a step back and look at what you're buying. For a few dollars more you could get a similar item in a better quality then go for it. Think about your bang for your buck. People often are shocked when they hear I spend $100 on a pair of shoes when I could get a knock off at Target. While yes, that is true, my $100 pair will last me 5 if not 10 years while my Target pair might only get me one maybe 2. Buying that Target pair every other year for 10 years and I'll actually end up spending more than just the one pair for $100. The quality items are most often worth the investment.
THINK ABOUT YOUR PURCHASE BEFORE YOU PURCHASE.
Online shopping is the worst. Scroll your phone while on the couch at night, think "that's cute, I like that" and click add to cart then bam, four days later it appears. And there's the regret. The thoughts of I didn't need it, I don't love it, and so on.
Open the Notes app on your phone and start a list of things you want to buy. Revisit it each week. If what you want stays on that list for a few weeks, then you really want it. Otherwise, delete it and don't look back.
My list from this year is quite long but most of them are wishlist investment pieces. I have added and deleted more times than I can count and I actually don't even remember most of the ones I've deleted. So I didn't REALLY need them now did I...
INVESTMENT PIECES ARE WORTH IT.
If there's one thing this resolution has taught me is that I have been much more reflective on what I buy. I have realized that cheaper brands fall apart and don't last while sustainable, classic brands stand the test of time.
GET A HOBBY.
Find something else to do instead of shopping. Especially boredom shopping. And online shopping. I can't even tell you how many books I've read this year because it's been my little escape. I think I've actually spent a pretty penny on books (that's a whole other issue of mine, but I resell them!) Adult coloring books have been a good hobby too. And also therapeutic.
A CAPSULE WARDROBE WORKS
After purging so much and keeping classic, well-made pieces in my closet with some fun pops of print and trendy pieces here and there, I've realized why the capsule wardrobe is such a good idea. Now, I'm not saying cut down to 30 pieces. Nope, no way, no how. But I am saying a capsule wardrobe with intentional pieces makes sense. Plus, it's a heck of a lot easier to get dressed in the mornign with fewer options in front of you.
And in case you're wondering about what I've added to my closet, here's what I've added along with WHY and HOW MUCH in 2019.
- a black sequin blazer from ThredUp for 53 cents. I had expiring credits and a black sequin blazer has been on my wardrobe wishlist for a few years. I didn't break my resolution. I found over $4 in change under the seats in my car to cover the 53 cents I spent. Ha!
- a pair of Birdies slippers from Poshmark that I traded someone a necklace and bracelet for. No money left my pocket and I was able to get rid of two things I'd been trying to sell for a while.
- a yellow raincoat from JCrew that cost me nothing- I had 2 coupon codes that I stacked plus JCrew rewards. They ended up owing me 6 cents. I kid you not.
Plus, I needed a raincoat, the one I wear doesn't keep me dry. So it was a necessity even though it was free.
- a new pair of work out sneakers because my old ones ripped. I was all set to just get a pair that was on the clearance rack at DSW but did some research for a few weeks instead and tried on multiple pairs and ended up with a pair of Brooks and couldn't be happier. Definitely worth the price and after discussing it with several people, they are one of the best brands around! These were a necessity. Therefore, it didn't break my resolution.
So, as the title says, I didn't cheat, I swear.
Allow me to explain....
For those new here (hi and welcome!) I gave up shopping for myself for 2019 as a New Year's resolution. Dumbest thing I've ever done, to be clear. It. Is. SO. Damn. Effing. Hard. Seriously.
I am a shopper. It's what I'm known for. Heck, it's what I live for.
When making this resolution, I gave myself a few exceptions.
1. I could still buy myself necessities and if I ran out of something I use, I could replace it.
2. While not shopping, I was also going to spend the year purging my home (closets, basement, you name it) and getting rid of nonsensical things just taking up space.
3. I had a wish list of things I could get if I found them for a good deal and I gave myself time to think and wasn't impulsive.
4. If I had credits, coupons, or rewards to shop technically "for free" than it wasn't considered shopping since I wasn't spending money.
5. At the end of each month, if i went the entire month without shopping for myself, I could reward myself with a little something off of my wishlist.
Now, I know most people do this to save the environment and be less wasteful and focus on more sustainable brands. But I will be brutally honest here, more power to them. I want to do all those things, but sometimes I want something fun and frivolous and sustainable brands can cost a pretty penny.
So, wondering why I didn't technically cheat. Well, you might think I did but after discussing with two of my advisors, they both agreed this wasn't cheating.
I have wanted a sequin blazer foreverrrrr. I mean forever. I blame my friend Jenn who showed up to a fashion show in a sequin blazer, white tee, jeans, and fun heels and looked AMAZING. So, this is her fault. Ha!
I received an email from ThredUp that I had a coupon code to come back for 40% off an item. It didn't tempt me. I then got an email that same day from them letting me know I had credit in my account that was about to expire if I didn't use it by month end. So, I went on their site and searched for a sequin blazer. And sure enough, one I had "loved" a while ago was back in stock! So, I clicked on it, applied my code and credits, and was left owing 53 cents.
Yes, 53 cents.
Would you spend 53 cents on this?!
Now, you might be shaking your head and thinking to yourself, "No, Naomi, you were doing SO great! You totally blew it." But, I didn't. See reason number 5. I have gone five FULL months without shopping for myself. And here I am trying to justify my 53 cent purchase to myself. Obviously, I'm doing amazingly well in this challenge as most people wouldn't even flinch.
But I spent serious thought dwelling on this and decided to go for it with these reasons:
1. It's less than a dollar. 53 cents. LITERALLY 53 cents out of pocket.
2. I could have found that amount of change in the seats of my car or on the ground of a parking lot.
3. It's less money than a lottery ticket and that's just flushing money down the toilet.
Now give it to me straight, do you think I cheated and blew my resolution? Or is it a justified purchase based on my rules.
I have officially made it two full months without shopping for myself.
Hard to believe, ain't it?! Ha ha.
In all seriousness, I feel a sense of relief. I never realized just HOW MUCH TIME I spent browsing online. Whether it be via Instagram influencers, bloggers I follow, Facebook ads, email marketing, or just random searches because I liked what someone was wearing.
Now, when or if I see a cute outfit, the first place I go is in my own closet. Shocking, right?! Why would I do that when the thrill of buying new is available?! Well, I am determined to rework my brain into thinking in a new capacity.
I have rediscovered things in my closet I forgot about. I have also continued to part with items as one of my resolutions is to remove 52 bags of stuff from my home over the 52 weeks of the year. I think I'm over 10 bags out of my house as of now, maybe 11 or 12. Is it bad that I already lost count?! I should probably keep better track.
This month, I added two new items into my wardrobe.
1. A new pair of Rothys. HOWEVER, I had referral credits available to use so they were free. And they're super fun and cute!
2. A new kitchen apron for myself and a matching one for Ness. This has been something I've been searching for for quite some time. I actually started looking last summer. I used Poshmark credit and got it there, so is it really shopping since I didn't spend "real money"?! And while they are 'girly' my toddler doesn't care and just REALLY likes to "match mommy"
How do you think I'm doing? Do you think I'll last the whole year?!
And for those wondering how my saving is going for my big reward, I'm doing great!
Yup. You read that right. In case you missed my new year's post. This year, I have given up shopping. Well, I have given up shopping for myself. No clothing, no accessories, no skincare, nothing for ME. Yes, I can still shop for my son, and yes, I can still shop for my husband. And yes, not to worry, I can still go grocery shopping. But for me, an AVID and what some might call a professional-bargain-hunter, giving up shopping for a year is no joke.
How has it been? Well, first of all, I will admit, it has been eye-opening for sure. The amount of time I spent scrolling randomly for good deals because of a "FLASH SALE" too good to pass up was bonkers. Plus, Poshmark has kind of sucked me in over the last two years for little things here or there because I have credits. So if it REALLY shopping?! {yes, it is really shopping, in my book at least}
A few things that helped me with this overwhelming and quite large personal challenge:
1. I unsubscribed from emails.
Like over 1000. Yeah, I know. It was crazy. And I've had to do it again because for some reason they subscribed me back! But, let me tell you how easy it has been to read my email each day. Mere minutes now, versus a good hour or more before!
2. I purged and sorted my closet.
This was a lot. I hear people spend a few hours doing it. I spent a week. And a few hours each day of that week to get through it. Yeah, it took a lot of time. But was it worth it? You better believe it. I have such an appreciation of what's in there now. And if I don't wear it this year, it's going. There's no need for me to have it "in case". In case what? I need that seventh white tee shirt. Nope.
I also had a lot of crap. Crap I didn't need. So the crap went.
I also was holding on to smaller sizes and bigger sizes because of the "what if". Well, what if I only had what fits me now and stayed with what fit me instead of allowing myself to fluctuate. Hmmmm. Life changing thought process right there.
And since taking these pictures, I am still parting with things. Like I've gotten rid of three pair of shoes so far.
3. I consigned and 'Poshmarked' things I no longer want or need.
I sorted what I was parting with and that also took a lot of time. I sorted into donations, regular consignment store, upscale consignment store, and Poshmark. I had a lot of accessories and jewelry I didn't wear anymore. A lot of presents and gifts. A lot of stuff. Just stuff. Why so much stuff?!
4. I unfollowed 1000 influencers on Instagram.
THIS. WAS. and IS. LIFECHANGING. Bloggers are now influencers and influencers are "swipe up and shop this must have item" and it was killing me! Why did I need another blue striped tunic? Or another pair of sandals? Or that adorable cardigan from Target?! As soon as I sat back and truly looked at who I was following who was putting out meaningful content to me, I unfollowed. And boy, it feels great!
5. I refuse to swipe up.
Don't do it. Just, Say. No. You don't need it. I swear.
6. I put my personal goal out into the universe.
I put it out here, on my blog. I put it out in my style insiders group on Facebook. I put it out on Instagram. And you know what? I lost several HUNDRED followers because of it. But guess what? Who cares.
7. I told my husband.
This was the hardest! He asked me if I was ok! If I was sure?! Can I do it?! Duuuuude... I'm SO doing it now! Watch me.
8. I plan on rewarding myself when I make it. Not IF I make it.
Yep. Because I'm going to do it. Just watch me.
In my first month, here's what I bought outside of groceries and household needs.
- Socks for my toddler. 18 cents. I had rewards at Old Navy and they were on sale. 12 pair, out of pocket 18 cents.
- 3 pair of boot socks for me. I had Loft rewards that were expiring. I needed a new pair of boot socks. I went in and they were on sale, so I was able to get 3 pair instead of one and not spend anything out of pocket because I just used rewards.
- Leopard Loeffler Randall booties via Poshmark. They arrived in January but I had bid on them in December and my offer was accepted. And I've worn them 4 times already. But I didn't BUY them in 2019 so it doesn't count. I'm just including it because it was added into my closet in 2019.
So, do you think I'm nuts? Insane? Stupid? Brave? All of the above? I honestly cannot believe I actually decided to do it. I mean seriously, I am a shopper. That's what I do. It's what I'm known for. I'm the bargain hunter, the deal finder, the stylist, I am THE SHOPPER.
